Fake Steve also has not had a heart attack. Just in case you're wondering.

Maybe you’ve heard about this already. CNN briefly ran a report this morning that Dear Leader suffered a heart attack and was rushed to the hospital. Katie Cotton says it’s not true. See the whole thing here. Apparently it was a citizen journalist site and it looks like they got punked. Or is it pwned? I can’t remember what the kids are saying these days. Suspicion is short-sellers doing this to tank the stock. Which they did. 

For the record, I want to assure everyone that Fake Steve also remains in super health, totally heart attack free. Though he did have a bad case of hives recently; apparently some kind of allergic reaction. He’s still on an island someplace, doing yoga and sleeping late. He sends his love.

12 Responses to “Fake Steve also has not had a heart attack. Just in case you're wondering.”

  1. Bill Atkinson

    I would still short AAPL. Even a false rumor shows how vulnerable the company is to Jobs one day kicking the oxygen habit. I guess Steve could name a Sarah Palin-type as his successor.

    And even if Jobs were immortal, Apple sticking to its overpriced business model during the New Great Depression is probably not going to help in the earnings department.

    Reply
  2. SamG

    Shorting a cake at the bakery is still allowed. I saw a bunch of bankers there this morning, self-short-help grouping themselves.

    Terminator state is running out of money. Imagine that. Who would have thought that muscle is not replacement for brainz? Love the Arnie, but c’mon. He is a terminator, not moneymanagerator.

    Reply
  3. Brinke

    PLEASE bring back Dear Leader. I just played with an iPhone for the first time today. We need his……genius.

    Reply

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