So says the Wall Street Journal in this report about the 3G iPhone not catching on in Japan. Money quote from an analyst: “The iPhone is a difficult phone to use for the Japanese market because there are so many features it doesn’t have.”

Much love to former Art Director Jason for the photo work.

  Politico reports that Dems are freaking out and fearing that Obama is toast. Money quote from a big Democratic fundraiser: “I’m so depressed. It’s happening again. It’s a nightmare.”  My sentiments exactly. How on earth did this happen?

My take on yesterday’s Apple event, for Newsweek.com. See here.

Can someone out there Photoshop a picture of Kim Jong Il standing in front of the slide from yesterday’s Apple event saying, “Reports of my death are greatly exaggerated”? Free fake Genius playlist if you’ll do the work.

I knew it was a bad sign when Goatberg wasn’t in attendance at the Apple event. According to our spies, Walt and his sidekick Katie had a 2-hour audience with Dear Leader a couple weeks ago. Presumably Walt also picked up his review units of the Nano-chromatic new devices at that time. So he knew [...]

Much love to Dear Reader Will for the Photoshop work, which I requested in this post about Dvorak’s latest wacky theory — that the Borg-Seinfeld ads are coded kinky sex ads. Or something. Dvorak looks good in leather, no?

  What the hell happened to Mr. Barry Obama? Back in Denver, up on the stage, he was on fire like a messiah. Now he’s washed out, wan, tired — he looks like he needs Geritol. The guy starts talking these days and your eyes just glaze over. For God’s sake, man. Say something short. [...]

South Korean intelligence reports that ODL (Original Dear Leader) has suffered a stroke. North Korea denies this, saying there’s “no problem,” and that ODL missed a parade because he got stuck in traffic, not because of any health problems. Pressed by an AP reporter, the spokesbot added, “The health of Kim Jong Il is a [...]

But Dear Leader remains alive and well (see photo above). Oh, and they’ve got some upgraded iPods and a new version of iTunes. Seriously? That’s it? I’m still trying to figure out why they held an actual event today instead of just putting out a press release. As a fellow filthy hack commented to me [...]