Darwin Award

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bWlLaPzcyOQ&color1=11645361&color2=13619151&hl=en&fs=1]

Florida surftard tries to kite-surf Tropical Storm Fay, falls slightly short of exceeds expectations.

28 Comments

  1. When Hit Sand Let Go So Not Dead

  2. Is there some joke Cannot is making? Am I missing something? All i see is crap I have to scroll past. I hope you get beaten with a book you act like you’ve read.

  3. Technically, the moron didn’t die, so he can’t actually win a Darwin Award… Although, boy did he come close…

  4. Looks like fun. Maybe they’ll make kite-surfing during a tropical storm or hurricane an Olympic sport.

  5. It looks like instead of DDOS, ‘Cannot’ did a focused denial of service on you (and us commentards). This kind of attack will forthwith be called ‘Immanuel Can’t’.

  6. “This kind of attack will forthwith be called ‘Immanuel Can’t’.”

    As in silly little Can’t ?

  7. Wow – that must have taken “Cannot” a long time to type in.

    -Pratical Reason
    ‘Immanuel Can’t’ – made me chuckle….

  8. I like ‘Immanuel Can’t’ but I nominate Kantard.

  9. Bono, that link is dead to me.

  10. Let us read from the scriptures:

    Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
    Who was very rarely sober
    Heidigger, Heidigger was a boozy beggar
    Who could drink you under the table
    David Hume could out-consume
    Schopenhauer and Hegel
    And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
    Who was just as sloshed as Schlegel!

    There’s nothing nature couldn’t teach
    About the raising of the wrist
    Socrates himself was permanently pissed

    John Stuart Mill, of his own free will,
    On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.
    Plato, they say, could stick it away–
    Half a crate of whisky every day.

    Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle.
    Hobbes was fond of his dram,
    And René Descartes was a drunken fart.
    ‘I drink, therefore I am.’

    Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed,
    A lovely little thinker,
    But a bugger when he’s pissed.

    Please be seated.

  11. Oh darn. The second line should have read, “was very rarely stable.”

    The piano has been drinking, not me. Not me.

  12. To the dickhead who thinks the comments is his own space for preaching – what the fuck?

    To Dan – hope you enjoyed your holiday, and thanks for coming back!

  13. Dan, good to have you back.

    To the Can’t rant…

    In WoW forums, people answer that kind of “Wall of Text” with

    TL;DR

    which means: Too long; didn’t read

  14. 1) That is by far the strangest troll I have EVAR seen.

    2) The video was down before I could watch it, but IIRC you don’t need to die to win a Darwin award, just take yourself out of the gene pool. So if he broke his junk that’s good enough.

  15. Horatio:

    You also missed this:

    “There’s nothing Nietsche couldn’t teach ya
    ’bout the raising of the wrist”…

    And Heidigger could THINK you under the table…

  16. WALL OF TEXT.

    CAN I HAVE A MEDAL?

    No seriously. Kantian Deontology is disgusting.
    Hardcore utilitarianism ftw.

    Healthy people – go now and chop out all your organs. Benefiting 7 people for the cost of 1 is so worth it.

  17. What, you expect me to get all the words right when I was pissed?

    Brian: “Now, just FUCK OFF!”

    Follower: “How shall we fuck off, o lord?”

    Brian: “Oh, go away. Just leave me alone!”

  18. “While all other religions endeavor to explain to the people by symbols the metaphysical significance of life, the religion of the Jews is entirely immanent and furnishes nothing but a mere war-cry in the struggle with other nations” (”Fragments for the history of philosophy,” Parerga and Paralipomena, Volume I).

  19. I know nothing about kite surfing, but… couldn’t he have just let go? What am I missing here?

    And thanks, Daniel, for posting a working link. I Kant get RealDan’s to work. (Sorry. Had to work that in somehow.)

  20. What some are missing, by not not reading Kant’s rant, is a new understanding, far beyond ipod or the latest gadgetry. namaste.

  21. shove KantRant up your Canknot

  22. @Horatio:

    Brian: (Takes off sandal to throw at followers)
    Follower #1: “He’s saying we should all go through life with one shoe!”

    Or something like that, haven’t thought about that movie in over 10 years…

  23. for those who lost the link, here ’tis — kite surf tard darwin award

    passing the hat around to get Kant-nut hurricane force kite surfing lessons in the gulf coast. who’s in?

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